Motto of the Gnomish Postal Service

Not sleeting rain nor driving snow
Will keep us from our path
Not goblin hordes nor lava flow
Nor ancient dragons' wrath

We won't be stopped by cunning traps
In warlords' dark redoubts
We'll climb in by our post-bag straps
To leave mail if they're out

Heroic posties will endure
Through zombies, death (and cramp)
But necromancers, please ensure
To use the proper stamps

And while we're at it, please resolve
To put more than the road
We won't use maps with clues to solve
Without the correct post-code

Apart from that, we'll struggle through
Past monsters, spells, or night
In one sense though, there's nothing new
Three-headed dogs still bite

Stuart Sharp is a writer and postgraduatehistorystudent currently living in East Yorkshire.

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